Archive for the 'weddings' Category

Oh, NO!

This is not my real post for the day but an issue has to be addressed.

I just checked out my Google Searches and this is how someone found my blog:

“fanny packs + bride & Groom”

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

All I can say is if you (fanny pack + bride & Groom searcher) are reading this blog know that you should not wear a fanny pack to your wedding. Please, don’t do it. Need fanny pack-less wedding tips? Please visit Molly’s blog.

That one scared me.

I will not be responsible for bridal fanny packs.

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It’s Wedding Season

Not really but…

After attending three weddings of the course of 21 years I have come to the conclusion I should be hired to attend them.

Really.

If you want your guests to get down on the dance floor and let loose, I’m your girl.

I have a strategy and although I could lose some profits I am willing to share it with you. You just have to promise to use these steps when you are a guest. Promise?

Step 1

It’s after dinner. Everyone is mingling, hopefully still drinking ( a lot) and who is that on the dance floor? Oh, yes. That is the ring bearer and his little cousins. Dance with him. Grab the flower girl and give her a few spins. It’s cute. The attention is in no way on you–hate to break it to you but there is no way you are cuter than that flower girl, no way. But the fact that you are on the floor makes others feel a comfortable about getting up to dance to their favorite jams.

Step 2

So we started with the youngest kids. Now you have to know what’s next. Find grandpa. Dance with him. Everyone should be enjoying themselves. Everyone.

Step 3

The Bride and Groom should totally be on the dance floor by now (you don’t get involved with this, they are busy meeting and greeting guests—you are in charge of helping everyone realize they should be on the dance floor, this is their day they can get down with their bad selves when they please).

Step 4

Create a “Soul Train.” Note: this is NOT a ChaCha line—if you can, stay as far away from the Macarena and the ChaCha line as you can, unless the Bride and Groom love those particular dances—ehhhhh. The “Soul Train” works like this. There are two lines of people facing each other, forming an open tunnel. A person from each line goes down the tunnel with their coolest/funkiest/most hilarious dance as a couple. It is a sight to be seen. Especially when the soul train consists of 3 year olds through 90 year olds.

Step 5

Where is the father of the bride?! Like I said, I am pretty experienced in the wedding thing, you know since I have been to 3 (I am totally joking, you have to know this right?!) and at the last wedding the father of the bride wanted to join in. He did the robot for an entire song. That’s what the FOB wanted to do…so that’s what I did too. So if all else fails pull out the robot, it’s a classic!

Well, that’s about it. These steps have also been proven to improve the moral at graduation parties as well. The reason I was even thinking about weddings is because of this lucky lady, Molly.

She just got engaged 🙂